What Are Yedan and Yemul at Korean Wedding?

Quick Summary

• In Korean wedding tradition, gifts play a big role in symbolizing the union of two families. Two important terms related to these gifts are yedan and yemul.
• Yedan are the gifts given by the bride’s family to the groom’s family.
• Yemul are the gifts between the bride and groom.
• Paemul is a jewelry set, given to the bride by the groom’s parents.

Korean weddings are a blend of centuries-old customs and modern practices.

Yedan and yemul represent the traditional aspects of a Korean wedding, which involve the exchange of gifts.

These gifts symbolize respect, goodwill, and a commitment to the union.

While some families stick to traditional practices, others prefer a more simplified approach.

What Is Yedan?

Yedan refers to the gifts from the bride’s family to the groom’s family.

Traditionally, these gifts included luxurious yet practical items, like silk fabrics, blankets, fine tableware, and silver spoons.

The purpose of yedan was not only to provide useful household items but also to show the bride’s family’s appreciation and willingness to integrate into the groom’s family.

However, the yedan tradition has evolved with time.

Instead of gifting household items, many families opt to give cash as a form of yedan.

This cash gift, known as yedanbi, generally ranges between $7,000 to $14,000 (10 million to 20 million won), depending on family expectations and financial status.

Interestingly, the groom’s family often returns half or even the full amount of the yedanbi as a practice known as bongchaebi.

Returning a portion of the yedan money shows gratitude and a desire to maintain a balanced relationship between the two families.

I’ve heard some stories where my friend’s family didn’t get this money back and it almost broke off the engagement.

Aside from cash, modern yedan gifts include:

• Luxury liquor (such as premium whiskey or traditional Korean soju)
• Cosmetics or skincare sets
• Traditional Korean sweets and fruit baskets
• Elegant floral arrangements

Regardless of what is given, yedan gifts are always beautifully packaged in silk bojagi, a traditional wrapping cloth that adds elegance.

On top of bongchaebi (partial/full refund from the groom’s family), some also offer an additional cash gift called kkumimbi, which means a makeover fee for the bride.

It’s a relatively new trend where luxury goods or cash worth $2,000 to $3,500 (3 to 5 million won) are given to the bride by her future in-laws before the wedding ceremonies.

What Is Yemul?

While yedan involves gifts between families, yemul refers to the gifts exchanged between the bride and groom themselves.

These gifts show their commitment to each other and are an important part of the wedding process.

A luxury watch is the most common yemul gift for the groom, often from brands like Rolex, Omega, or Cartier.

And the bride typically receives high-end jewelry, such as:

• A diamond ring
• A gold or platinum necklace
• A bracelet or earrings
• Or, a designer handbag (Chanel, Hermès, or Louis Vuitton being the most popular choices)

Additionally, there is paemul, which means a jewelry set given to the bride by the groom’s parents.

This set is often made of gold or diamonds.

This shows the groom’s family’s affection and acceptance of the bride as a new member of their family.

Are Yedan and Yemul the Source of Conflict?

Yes, they can be.

While yedan and yemul are meaningful customs, they can create tension, especially when expectations between families differ.

Issues often arise in cases where:

• One family has significantly more wealth than the other, leading to unequal gift exchanges.
• The groom’s family expects a larger yedanbi amount than the bride’s family is willing or able to provide.
• The bride’s family demands expensive yemul gifts from the groom.
• One side views the tradition as outdated and prefers a simplified approach, while the other insists on maintaining formality.

What Are the Modern Approach?

Many young couples prefer to modernize or minimize the yedan and yemul tradition.

Here are some common adaptations:

• Skipping yedan altogether and replacing it with a simple cash gift.
• Opting for practical gifts like home appliances (e.g., high-end air purifiers, smart TVs, or dishwashers).

While traditional families may keep the old customs, many younger generations now focus on financial practicality rather than extravagant gift-giving.

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Yedan and yemul remain a significant part of Korean weddings.

While their traditional meanings are still valued, young people take more practical and flexible approaches.

At the end of the day, the ultimate goal is to celebrate the union of two people and their families!