Breakups are tough in every culture, and South Korea is no exception.
Korean men have different ways of ending relationships, ranging from face-to-face conversations to ghosting.
Here’s how Korean guys typically break up, based on recent statistics.
Quick Summary
- 74% of Korean men in their 20s and 30s break up in person using phrases like “heojija” (“Let’s break up”) or “geuman mannaja” (“Let’s stop seeing each other”).
- 40% opt for a breakup through messaging on KakaoTalk.
- 34% choose to break up over the phone for a middle ground between in-person and text.
- 12% resort to ghosting, a method seen as the worst way to end things.
Most Korean Guys Break Up in Person
According to an article on Newsway, the majority of Korean men in their 20s and 30s, around 74%, break up in person.
Why Do They Prefer This?
Korean men who choose in-person breakups often do so for closure, despite the emotional difficulty.
A face-to-face breakup allows both parties to express their feelings, clear up misunderstandings, and achieve a sense of finality.
Common Phrases Used in Korean Breakups
When breaking up in person, Korean men typically say:
- “Heojija” (헤어지자): “Let’s break up.”
- “Geuman mannaja” (그만 만나자): “Let’s stop seeing each other.”
- “Deo isang neoreul joahaji ana” (더 이상 너를 좋아하지 않아): “I don’t like you anymore.”
This method, while difficult, is the most respectful and leaves less room for uncertainty.
Digital Breakups Through Messenger Are Common
With Korea’s digital culture and the widespread use of KakaoTalk, 40% of Korean men break up via text messages.
Why Do They Choose Messaging?
- Less confrontation: They don’t have to deal with the immediate emotional reaction.
- Easier exit: Some guys feel it’s a softer way to let go of short-term relationships.
- Avoids guilt: It allows them to disconnect without seeing their partner’s emotional pain.
However, breaking up over KakaoTalk is often viewed as impersonal and inconsiderate, especially for long-term relationships.
Some Break up Over the Phone as a Middle Ground
34% of Korean men end relationships over a phone call, making it the third most common method.
Why Do Some Prefer a Phone Call?
- More direct and respectful than a text message.
- Less intense and uncomfortable than an in-person breakup.
- Allows for a real-time verbal exchange of emotions and explanations.
A phone call breakup is better than texting but still lacks the closure of an in-person conversation.
A Few Resort to Ghosting (or “Submerging Underwater” as Koreans Say)
12% of Korean men choose ghosting by completely cutting off communication with no explanation.
Why Do Some Men Ghost?
- They want to avoid conflict and difficult conversations.
- They believe disappearing is easier than saying it outright.
- They don’t want to deal with the other person’s emotions.
Ghosting in Korean Culture
Koreans refer to ghosting as “jamsu tada (잠수 타다)”, which literally means “submerging underwater.”
It implies disappearing suddenly, like a submarine diving beneath the ocean’s surface.
Ghosting is widely considered the most disrespectful way to break up, as it leaves the other person feeling confused and emotionally hurt.
Do Koreans “Monkey Branch” to Another Relationship?
According to Urban Dictionary, monkey branching means “getting your next relationship set up before dumping your current S/O.”
In Korean, this is called “hwanseung ibyeol (환승 이별)”, which means a “transit breakup” or “transfer breakup.”
Why Is It Called a Transit Breakup?
The idea comes from transferring from one train to another.
The person “transfers” their romantic interest from their current partner to a new one.
Is It Common in Korea?
Many Koreans consider hwanseung ibyeol a major betrayal because it means the relationship was likely over before the breakup even happened.
While it’s not the most common breakup style, it does happen, especially in Seoul where most people didn’t grow up together like in a small town.
In Korea, we have a saying, “When the junk car leaves, a Benz arrives.”
It means that after a bad relationship (the “junk car” or we literally say “s**t car”) ends, a much better one (the “Mercedes-Benz”) will come along.
Despite the sad breakup, better things are ahead of you.
No matter how a breakup happens, the key is to move on in a healthy way.
